# #ritual

4 poems

## [AS 21](https://chromato.graphics/as21)

if you’re hearing this,  
it’s ’cause i trust you.  
there’s a lot of detail,  
high resolution scans.

i take an early flight.  
nothing good is easy.  
_what am i forgetting?_  
chocolate orange peels.

i program on the airplane  
to distract from humming  
in my eardrums; an engine  
whirring to life in my chest.

she applies the night before  
risks her body just for more.  
she knows she has to see it  
before i remember my face.

jetway’s made of glass,  
eyes have steel blades.  
_what am i forgetting?_  
54-inch red shoelace.

_“do you want to get the_  
_fuck out of this airport?”_  
she picks up both bags  
before i can say a word.

she borrows a tapedeck.  
i hold her knee. _is this ok?_  
the postal service can’t  
ship this in a flat rate box.

distance desires ritual  
we find a matchbook  
_what am i forgetting?_  
ashen coffee. burning.

the next thing i know  
we’re at the terminal.  
lipstick can stain more  
than cardboard cups

**time stopped in total:**  
14 hours, 28 minutes

## [readwrite](https://chromato.graphics/readwrite)

have you ever  
had a girl cause  
engineering  
just for it, though

weeks of design  
on a one-off  
built for the thing —  
to program it

on the airplane  
commit to it:  
make it perfect,  
then install it

when you get there,  
show it slowly  
touch a curved shape  
feel its edges

unarchive it  
press it with force  
watch it open,  
animated

every app must  
have its settings  
even if they  
never vary

have you ever  
caused a toy to  
glow from within  
white light blinking

when you read it  
you can see it:  
why it matters,  
what you’ll put there

have you ever  
caused a thing to  
strip itself bare  
kernel panic!

this will only  
take a second,  
last a lifetime  
deep within you

type it all out  
hold it down now  
your domain, name  
hit the button

have you ever  
felt an object  
as it’s written  
becoming yours

## [t4t](https://chromato.graphics/t4t)

i read that things used to be different for us. that we used to hide behind heavy coats, from ourselves. i read that we’d get compared to cigarettes on the street in broad daylight just for walking the wrong way. things are different for us now. not because we are the majority, but because we are not, and we know that. our difference is our value.

things changed because seasons did. the old trees that once ruled the forest have fallen, been subsumed into the soil. things changed because our elders fought for us and their enemies dwindled. life is no less complicated here and now. it may be more so. but that complexity, that intricacy, that is part of what makes this worth it.

i went on a date yesterday. they had two faces and three names. his lips felt like safety and possibility and becoming. we didn’t need to connect our brains with wires to see. we spoke the same language, we knew the same songs. our bodies united like an antique lock and key, lubricated with the oil of our passion. i want more. no, i need it.

all my friends are trans. i broke up with the ones who weren’t.  
they understood.

change is good. the people that don’t get that will never get us. not all change is for the better, but the potential for growth and for flourishing is all we have. the possibility that tomorrow will be a new day with new rules. and that we’ll be here for each other when it arrives. that we’ll nurture the seeds and each other. that we can.

## [bioavailable](https://chromato.graphics/bioavailable)

there’s always a question  
when i come into contact  
with the substance of you.

how much of you can i absorb?  
when you enter my bloodstream,  
swim my veins where they lead.

the longer your half-life,  
the more i’ll feel you there,  
coursing through my core.

the closer your shape  
gets to nature, the better  
i can fully take you in.

drink you or swallow you  
or let you dissolve under  
my tongue every day as

you transform me with  
area under your curves.  
when is my next dose?